


If You'd Just Wanted Me

by furyofthephoenix



Category: The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Darkness, F/M, Language, Reader-Insert, You've been warned, a really dark fic, damn you ben barnes, i really had the most fun with this, like really, possessive billy russo, rating went up for the next chapters, who knew
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-25
Updated: 2019-01-09
Packaged: 2019-10-07 07:27:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17361608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/furyofthephoenix/pseuds/furyofthephoenix
Summary: Truths are revealed. Control is being tested. A dark Billy is showing his true colors.





	If You'd Just Wanted Me

**Author's Note:**

> I have a concept in my head but it seems like my second imagine where I have no idea in which direction to take it. I seriously had to challenge myself to delve into the twisted character of Billy. Well, this story took a dark turn. Last gif by @willmcavoys
> 
> Warning: Angst, language (I can’t control myself, lol)

[buffyannepratt](buffyannepratt.tumblr.com)

It was one call. One call which brought your world crashing down. Which changed everything you thought you knew.

A distorted voice. Of course, it was.

It could have been a man or a woman, and it didn’t matter in the end.

“You’re a smart woman, Miss (Y/L/N). Do you really think you know your husband-to-be? Just some food for thought.”

A shiver went down your back when you heard the ominous click, indicating how your anonymous caller had hung up on you. Your eyes met the glinting diamond ring adorning your finger. 

You shook your head, feeling your throat closing up. A look over your shoulder showed you were still alone, and that Billy was not here yet. You did not know what to make of this call. Even the idea of Billy being aware of it made you nervous.

Shaking your head, you tried to erase it from your mind.

* * *

A few hours later Billy went home. His hair slightly ruffled from an exhausting day, yet his black suit was still as immaculate as it was this morning when he left for work.

He shut the door behind him, sending a small grin her way.

“Hey, you. Waiting for me? Makes me think we’re already married,” he joked.

Rolling your eyes, you turned your head away with a smile. Billy dropped his keys in the bowl beside the door and his hand caressed your cheek, making you feel tingly all over. A weight settled beside you on the couch.

[thepunishergifs](thepunishergifs.tumblr.com)

Gazing back at him, you found a tense worry in his eyes. His hand wandered to your neck, it felt like he was holding you in place so you couldn’t avert your eyes away from him.

“What’s wrong? Something happened today?”

“No,” you whispered. “Nothing to worry about, Billy.”

His stare was still fixated on you, his dark eyes trying to pry away your secrets.

“Are you sure?”

Nodding, you sighed when you heard Billy’s phone ring as he was forced to let go of you.

“I’m going to make dinner for us,” you said, standing up from the couch.

Billy looked up from under his eyelashes, sending you a warning. “To be continued.”

* * *

Sighing, your gaze found the time on your phone while you were trying to find some rest in the dark bedroom. Your stare wandered to your fiancé lying next to you, already sound asleep.

His chest was moving slowly up and down. Your body inched closer to his, hoping to get some sleep and knowing you would always get it through his warm form giving you much needed comfort.

You let out a sigh, his warm skin softening up your muscles. Your hand met his chest, feeling his heart pattering underneath it. Eyeing the scar lining up his shoulder, you were brought back to the time when he finally told you about it.

_Billy was a secretive guy._

_There was nothing new about it._

_If anything, he needed some time to trust the people around him._

_He was more like reluctant to show his emotions or reveal how it was like growing up the way he did. And showing his true self._

[buffyannepratt](buffyannepratt.tumblr.com)

_“My mom didn’t love me enough. In the end, I realized she loved the meth more than she ever loved me. You know what? I’m not exactly sure where I was born. But the way that I see it, even if your meth-head mother safe-havens you at a fire station in Albany, you’re still born in the greatest country in the world.”_

_His statement tore you up inside. He wasn’t saying it, but Billy honestly believed that no one could ever genuinely love him._

_“You know that’s not true._ I  _know that’s not true.” Your hand caressed his cheek, trying to convey what you were feeling. His gaze was evading yours. “You don’t have to pretend with me.”_

_Before long, you talked about his scar adorning his shoulder. You thought to yourself to use the opportunity if he was willing to talk about his past._

[stormborn](stormborn.tumblr.com)

_“I must’ve been ten, eleven at the time. When a grown man tells you that you’re pretty you know nothing good is coming. Let’s just say I wasn’t interested in the kind of games that he had in mind. So, I went after him with the stickball bat. Caught him good a couple times, too. Then he broke my arm. Got pissed off, ripped my rotator cuff in three places.”_

_Bitterness was painted on his features. His twisted smirk showing off his intentions._

_You knew what this meant. Billy was on the verge of self-destruction._

_“What about you? Got any horrifying stories about your scars I should know about?”_

_Shrugging, you pulled up your shirt so you could show the smooth surface of your stomach, save for a small patch of your skin in the length of a finger. “Fell into a glass table when my brother pushed me,” you said drily._

_Billy’s lips were twitching. But he couldn’t hold it in for long before he let out a hearty laugh, pulling you in._

* * *

A new message flew in.

_Bedroom. Loose floor board by the window._

You were biting your lip, feeling a heavy weight settle in your stomach. Should you do it, you thought.

Before you knew what was happening your feet were leading you towards the bedroom, your fingers clenching at your sides nervously.

What you found was not what you had expected. And here you were expecting a sex tape, maybe even some porn magazines.

But nothing like this.

A gun. Money. Several passports. All with Billy’s face but never the same name.

Strangely, the name William Russo was never displayed in these documents.

_What the hell is going on here_ , you thought.

You turned your head, looking around in fright. Your gaze found the gym bag lying around in the corner, our mind already set.

Billy Russo was a damn liar. Who knew what else he had lied about?

There was only one possibility for you.

* * *

[barnesplots](barnesplots.tumblr.com)

Billy clenched his fists together, his skin turning white to the pressure.

His staff could feel the tension in the loft. Billy had stopped stomping down the living-room and was now sitting in the bedroom, with his gaze fixed to the others.

He clenched his hands tighter. The stinging pain from holding the object in his palms was a welcome distraction from the possibility.

That his fiancée had left him.

Without a word. Nothing.

The moment he had arrived he thought nothing of the silence. But then his eyes found the glinting object left behind on the nightstand. His nightstand.

The engagement ring.

“What did you find?”

He bolted upright, not being able to sit still any longer and stomped over to the gadgets of his techies. They jolted at his booming voice.

His features twisted. He couldn’t care less if he was scaring them.

[hvitserkk](hvitserkk.tumblr.com)

No, that wasn’t true. Billy was hoping they were afraid of him. Fear was a good motivator if he wanted to find his wife-to-be. Screw what you wanted.

You wanted to leave him?

Over his dead body.

* * *

You sighed, enjoying the warm water streaming down your body as you stood in the shower stall of the motel room you were frequenting. Pinching yourself, you were reminded of not taking up too much time.

You were constantly looking over your shoulder, feeling paranoid ever since you had left Billy’s apartment.

Billy was a man with connections and if he wanted to, he could use them to find you. Didn’t mean he actually wanted to owe people anything.

You shut off the water and dried yourself with a towel. Next, you put on your jammies for the night and pulled yourself under the covers. A few hours later, you were woken up by a shiver going through your body.

Something lit up your phone.

_Two new messages_

_I’m sorry_

_He knows where you are_

The hairs on your neck were standing up. You could feel something staring at you.

You gasped, turning your body around, and finding Billy sitting on a chair by the door.

A bitter smile twisted his features, his fingers were supporting his head.

[c-sand](c-sand.tumblr.com)

“You know, I’m going to be honest, sweetheart… if I didn’t know any better I’d say you were avoiding me.”

* * *

Billy’s hand stroked your cheek devotedly.

You allowed it for a few seconds, before you reminded yourself who he was.

That you didn’t know who he was anymore.

You tried to ignore the flinch coursing though his face. You must have imagined it.

An hour ago, he took you from that room, with your bag, and brought you back to his place. Now you were sitting on the floor, refusing to move.

“You should eat something, (Y/N)),” he said, a tray of breakfast conjuring up behind his back.

You refrained from looking at him, despite how much the smell let your mouth water.

Billy even made bacon.  _Damn him!_

“And you should start by telling the truth, Billy. If that is even your name.”

Billy sighed, slowly dropping the tray to the ground.

“You found the passports,” he said with resignation, anger painted on his features. “Who told you?”

Your face was the mirror image of his.

“Does it matter? You’re a damn liar, nothing more.”

Clenching his teeth, he offered, “So what? You see some passports and decide to leave me? Throw away three years just like that?” He snapped his fingers, pulling you away from your thoughts.

Gulping, you said, “Passports. A gun and stacks of money. Who the hell are you?”

His hand held onto your jaw, his reflexes taking you by surprise. It surprised you that you felt that Billy would never hurt you, despite his hard mannerisms.

“You know who I am. I get it, you feel like you can’t trust me but I’m a patient man.” He looked to the right corner of his eye. “More or less.”

“How can I,” you whispered, tears gathering in your eyes.

He was angrily biting his bottom lip at her words.

“I’d have given you the world. I’d have given you anything you ever wanted, if you just wanted me.”

Billy let go of you.

You released the breath you had been holding, looking up as he was standing above you.

[willmcavoys](willmcavoys.tumblr.com)

“Eat up, sweetheart.”


End file.
